#its been quite a year
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Hi Sweeping Tree! It's been a long time since I've interacted with you. Know it's not a big ask but wanted to see how you're doing these days?
Hello!! I got married, got a house, and had a baby!!!!!!!!!!
#answered ask#ITS BEEN QUITE A YEAR#thank you so much for asking you're so sweet#but yeah its been quite a year QUITE A YEAR#i literally just gave birth like#two months ago
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it's time to go, my love (ID in alt)
#vashwood#trigun maximum spoilers#vash the stampede#nicholas d wolfwood#trigun#trigun maximum#ruporas art#been in a very bad Art rut lately... the fatigue is finally catching up so i turned to my very trusty muses#to bring me somewhere. somehow its vol 10 i always return to. though i thnk this is the first time im posting v10 art#i have so many in my drafts but this vol always made me emotional. It's been a year now so my emotions#They've cleared up. Somewhat.#i think i just delusioned myself into a place where ww is always alive bc i draw him well and healthy all the time. his death is such an#essential part to the narrative though... i'll never be able to run from it completely :']. anyway. im not too sure how to elaborate my#Thoughts on this one but i am quite Happy with the blueness of it all.
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Shen Yuan getting transported into pidw isn't "the system punishing him for being a lazy internet hater," but instead representative of "step 1 of the creative process: getting so mad at something you decide to go write your own fucking book" in this essay I will
#svsss#scum villian self saving system#shen qingqiu#shen yuan#the fact that people think scum villain#-a series that examines and criticizes common tropes in fiction-#is somehow against criticism or being a little hater is wild to me#especially since shen qingqiu never gets punished for being a hater#heck- he's still a little hater by the end of the series#he mostly gets punished for treating life like a play and like he and the people around him are characters#(or in other words- he suffers for denying his own wants and emotions and his own sense of empathy)#I think some of y'all underestimate how much writing/art is inspired by creaters being little haters#like example off the top of my head-#the author of Iron Widow has been pretty vocal about the book being inspired by their hatred of Darling in the Franxx#I think my interpretation of Shen Yuan's transmigration is also supported by the fact that this series is an examines writing processes#side note- though i understand why people say Shen Yuan is lazy and think its a valid take it still doesnt sit right with me#i am probably biased because my own experiences with chronic pain and depression and isolation#but ya- i dont think Shen Yuan is lazy so much as he is deeply lonely and feels purposeless after denying parts of himself for 20ish years#like yall remember the online fandom boom from covid right?#being stuck completely alone in bed while feeling like shit for 20 days straight does shit to your brain#the fact that no one came to check on him + he wasn't exactly upset about leaving anyone behind supports the isolation interpretation too#+in the skinner demon arc he describes his life of being a faker/inability to stop being a faker now that he's Shen Qingqiu#as “so bland he's tempted to throw salt on himself” and “all he could do is lay around and wait for death” (<-paraphrasing)#bro wants to be doing stuff but is stuck in paralysis from repeatedly following scrips made by other people#another point on “Shen Yuan isn’t lazy” is just the sheer amount of studying that man does#also he did graduate college- how lazy can he really be#he doesnt know what hes doing but he at least tries to actively train his students#and he actually works on improving his own cultivation + spends quite a bit of time preping the mushroom body thing#+he's experiencing bouts of debilitating chronic pain throughout all this#but ya tldr: Shen Yuan's transmigration is an encouragement to write and not a punishment and also i dont think its fair to call him lazy
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#a doodley#i had to make this blue so tumblr would stop hiding it from the dash#anyway no caption this happened 2 hrs ago#im happy abt my surgery but it and other things this year keep beinging conversations like these up#and i cant handle it at all.#everything my dad tells me just makes me feel worse and not bc its anything bad but bc I Feel Bad#like the conversation then continued to him being like no dont cry im just saying i wpuld have wanted to#quit my job decades ago and set aside money so I wouldnt be struggling as much now but that didnt happen#and i just dont want that to happen to you guys :)#so we have to support u so that your life is what u want it to be#and i cried even more bc what do u mean. thats so sad. ur a person and u were a child and baby once and ur gonna die#and you always almost cry when u talk about your mom who passed away decades ago#and your brothers that passed away#recently and im going to be your age and still sobbing bc i miss my dad. just like i have been prematurely crying about since i was 7#the other day my dad asked my mom if i cried a lot when i was a baby/kid and my mom said no and then my dad#said that when i Did cry it was so severe he thought i would ''drown in my own tears''#bc i could never stop. like. thats still true today. ive been crying on and off since then#i think i mentioned he's just been telling me stories about his life lately and it further fuels this. i get so sad. im sorry your life was#like this. i dont want to die i dont want you to die im sad im sorry im sorry#im scared. im never going to see you again. how horrible. how horrible#i cant enjoy my day today bc every day is a day closer and i get sad
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NO MORE ASSOCIATING THINGS WITH FEMMES ONLY BECAUSE THEY ARE PINK!HYPERFEM FEMMES ARE GREAT AND I LOVE YOU CAMPY FEMMES WHO EMBODY PINK BUT ALSO JESUS CHRIST CAN YOU GUYS NOT GO MORE THAN ONE DAY W/O TRYING TO SHOEHORN FEMMES INTO BEING ONLY PINK UWU BABIES. I AM FEMME AS IN GRASS AS IN DIRT AS IN TREE BARK AS IN WEEDS SPROUTING THROUGH THE SIDEWALK CEMENT. FEMME AS IN GENDER NONCONFORMITY AS IN FUCK YOU MY FEMININITY IS WHAT *I* SAY IT IS. FEMME AS IN DEPTH AND DARKNESS AND WARMTH AND TERROR. FEMME AS IN CAVES. FEMME AS IN LIGHTNING. FEMME AS IN AN AMALGAMATION OF TRAITS THAT I HAVE DECIDED ARE FEMININE REGARDLESS OF WHAT SOCIETY SAYS. FUCK IS IT THAT HARD TO UNDERSTAND?!???
#personal#i am emotional yes#over the years ive had this blog I've made a few posts abt being femme#nd whether they're serious or jokey..... inevitably someone in the tags goes “ohhh yeah bc pink”#or in the case of what inspired this post: someone going “what about the pink ones” on my praying mantis post#and im just.#sick of it. im sick of femme being equated to pink and frilly girlie behaviors.#im sick of femme being equated to skirts and heels. to makeup. to skincare. to pristine nails exactly almond shaped.#im sick of ppl acting like All femmes aspire to this shit. im sick of femms being reduced to this shit.#and i love pink! i love pink! my phone theme is quite literally just black and pink all over.#im just. so tired of any expression of Femme identity being shoehorned into being a Specific type of femininity#especially as someone who DOES get dysphoric wearing skirts. wearing dresses. embodying the femme aesthetic yall are so set on making#if u guys wanna rb this i truly dont care#i just needed to scream#and this is one small thing#but the 2nd largest category of anon hate i have gotten since making this blog is str8 up homophobia from other “queer” folks#saying i cant be femme bc of how i present. calling me slurs (and using them as such) bc they cant understand femme as anything but that#my wife and i have our users in our personal discord server set as 2 different things of anon hate ive gotten#i have had OTHER FEMMES tell me i am not femme. femmes who Know im femme who still call me butch. femmes who ive corrected and been blocked#-by bc of it. the number 1 largest demographic of queerfolk who have me blocked rn is TME femmes who embody pink also#and i dont think its a coincidence at all. (and i know this bc i go to try and follow these ppl bc they get rbed on my dash & i cant)#and ik their blogs arent deleted bc some of them don't block my wife (tall. white. butch) and it cant be politics cause her and i rb#a lot of the same political shit (fuck. i think she rbs More than i do even. this is genuinely mainly a nsft blog)#and usually i don't say anything but im having a bad day so i get to be angry about this and if anyone fucking tries me i will block u#idc if we've been mutuals 4ever. im judt so tired of feeling like i am not Enough as a femme bc i dont embody this shit#im sick of this lameass lip service to he/him gnc femmes etc when the thin white 50s housewife femme is still what is preferred and loved#im sick of this lamesss lip service when y'all feel entitled to theorizing on other femmes genders bc u cant conceptualize a femme who does#wanna be hypetfeminine. im sick of it. im sick of it. im sick of it.#celebrity bun
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Lackadaisy Enrichment
#in our enclosures!!#video linked as source; which i'm glad to see already has a million views and is trending. That's Right#lackadaisy#WHICH i have been reading since at least '07 when i was thirteen my god b/c this animation is based on the ongoing webcomic#like does its influence show up Directly in some Discrete way i can point to in my art? not very easily probably. And Yet.#the inspiration....i wasn't able to be Regularly Only for at least another year / art done Nonprofessionally Online was novel to me#like wow ppl can make & post fanart of w/e they love huh....didn't know webcomics were a thing & i never really read that many since but.#good god the quality of Lackadaisy at its onset is like this is superb?? this person putting in all their talent and effort???#and Then you get years & years more art and i don't even know what superlatives to throw out abt its quality as it evolves. obsessed w/it..#if i see a new lackadaisy comic page i Will be acting out. obviously this animation is a delight & also stunning. and fascinating to also#juxtapose as a Translation / Interpretation of the comic in a different medium & standalone snippet of Story#and that we're not even quite there in the comic timeline; Taking Notes abt character info we get distilledly here....genuinely love like#take it back to '07 i'm like oh boy can't wait for the dream team to assemble. then a decade later when it did? Oh Boy. that is payoff lol#namely hooray for stitches and mudbug at the field office for every passing gangster. killing one marigold associate but not the other#which seems like a promising start to shootouts w/the other dream team triumvirate. i adore that in canon so far mordecai freckle & rocky#have met but only over a nice brunch. re: all intentions anyways. anyways i'm like Gifs Must Be Made while i'm also so riled afresh abt the#comic that i've been sooo hype for for over fifteen yrs now babeyyy Deservedly. i've done a couple of rereads & ought to do another....#For Interest it'd probably take a few sittings to catch up from the start but there is much to be engaged over....this ongoing story that's#historical fiction prohibition bootlegging cats with plenty of focus on characters & several Mysteries. which i'm better at parsing now lol#like one of the more recent rereads like Oh Of Course x (probably) accidentally killed his y & z took the fall & that's a binding secret...#Not [oh of course] abt the circumstances surrounding a's death & how b & c were involved. nor the ''what's marigold's damage'' mystery#which is great. love to not know things. love that we can readily follow all the emergent drama everyone's wading in nowadays. hell yeah#anyways admire my organized approach to gifs here. four shots each Expressions Atmosphere Action Groupshots#sure might've muddled through gifmaking for this anyways but fr being a huge lackadaisy comic enjoyer for now most of my life helps#and its very Overall Inspiration like. just really getting the [you can really just draw stuff out here] going. fr the art's detail & skill#and that enrichment like i'm gonna have a great time following this. And I Have#you don't expect a crowdfunded indie animation in the mix back then but hell yeah fellas#SIGH ok removing a 4th gif that's broken / not displayed despite reuploading then entirely remaking it. if it's a bug i'll try again later
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happy "our marriage is never gonna recover from this" day
#this is why you share your plan with 1 (one) other person; kids. otherwise you end up embarrassing yourself in front of the people#you were trying to impress (and the man youve fallen head over heels for)#nyxtalks#ofmd#our flag means death#izzy hands#israel hands#ed teach#edward teach#blackbeard#september 1st#s01e04#Discomfort in a Married State#gif#i didnt get the colour grading quite how i wanted it but i had fun tweaking them! its all learning; baybeee#im having fun! hopefully new laptop will have the power to let me control more things. maybe#(or maybe thats just skill issues ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)#yall gotta be nice to me ok im still figuring things out#also like. as i said earlier. i knowwww this scenes been giffed to shit. but also not so many with the leap year note! so.#i learnt that 1717 was NOT a leap year in the process of making this. djenks i feel betrayed & lied to#did YOU remember we had a february 29th this year? because i sure didnt. i squandered her
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And some days, I just wish you wouldn't look at me at all.
#ffxiv#sketch#wol#meteor survivor#zenos yae galvus#adventurer zenos#oh no#its the consequences of his actions#everything is fine until the only man on the star you care about looks at you with the same contempt your father did#(Meteor's not doing it intentionally- its a reflex after he comes back for quite a bit)#and zenos is getting bodied because its been a while since... you know... him being able to really feel anything at all#and no- its not him regretting anything that had to do with varis- just him regretting the thought meteor could look at him like that#little does Meteor know he's emotionally bodying the man he's trying to be cordial with#its a little okay because in how I write adventurer zenos this serves as one of his main wake-up calls to make some changes#and realizing both the mistakes he's made with meteor and that meteor hating him in any way is actually -not at all- what he wants#but not okay on the end that every time meteor does this he has to watch zenos actively dissociate right in front of him#until zenos just kinda autopilots and walks away#the second time (or perhaps third) in the last 11 years that zenos has felt regret to any major capacity-#on meteor's end I just enjoy seeing the progression of the WoL through subtext#and why meteor is willing to even entertain the idea despite how much he hates zenos- his decisions and the path he's walked#is the realization that there is high chance that he could actually be a direct catalyst for zenos' growth#and the realization the wol has that they were the only one zenos has ever genuinely reached out to#besides- i just like the idea of having your equal other half fighting back to back with you- or being able to handle threats you cant#and i find their dynamic neat- of meteor not forgiving zenos but giving him his last chance- and growing to enjoy being around him#and zenos being able to work on moving past being the weapon or the monster- finding the connections he's longed for#and giving himself purpose to finally truly just live- for him to learn to experience and have the freedom to find what he enjoys#(and curiously him having estinien's brand of accidently helping people even in StB gives me ideas...)#but enough tag ranting- ill get to zenos' actual adventuring in another post lol
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[email protected] studies
#sam winchester#spn#supernatural#supernatural season 1#spn fanart#art#digital art#artists on tumblr#my younger sister and I just rewatched season one and I genuinely had forgotten so much of it lol#it's been a few years since I even thought of this show lol#its uhhhhhh really quite dated haha#like a time capsule#it came out in 2005 and when that sank in i was SHOOK
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Bingqiu ponies (Happy Birthday @Piosplayhouse!)
#poorly drawn svsss#svsss#luo binghe#shen qingqiu#equineswap au#They live in the same universe: I'm making it canon right now#I do think there are probably better horse breeds to assign these two#but as far as my little PD-SVSSS guys go - I think these fit alright.#Arabian for the gracefulness and elegance. Beautiful horse (all horses are beautiful so its a close race)#(and the missing rib. Cause....you know....)#Didn't quite get the head shape right but there is always next time.#Shetland binghe for the handsome little guy energy. I personally think a non silly little guy LBH would be a shire horse.#This is 100% an open invitation to debate and discuss in the comments and tags btw. I am no expert on SV or horses.#Also HI PIO! If you're reading this I just want to say thank you a million times over for everything.#You've been so kind and supportive and I think you are a brilliant and hilarious person. The tides of the yaoi wars turned when you enliste#I hope this next year for you brings wonderful things. You're a brilliant force in this world and we all are drawn to your light.#Happiest of birthdays to you B*)
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finally posting my piece for @sheikzine ⭐️ i drew sheik from retro studios canceled sheik game!
#the legend of zelda#zelda#loz#sheik#ocarina of time#retro studios#sheik zine#honestly i was starting to type out a long sappy post about my experience with the zine but ill save that for the donation post#btw we are so sorry that its been so long and we havent posted it ajchjshdjsndjjddm#we literally donated the money in jan#there were a few factors that just prevented us from completing the donation post... but it should be up in a few days#were aiming for sheik day! since were already late might as well do it on his day#anyway about the actual drawing#ngl there are some things i wouldve done differently now#but im still quite happy with it!!#kellen and i both did canceled sheik pieces so you should check his out too#ALSO... if yall are still reading#im going to be opening comms soon!#i literally did up a comm sheet today#finally after so many years im opening comms... i hope youll support me!
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As of today, November 1st, this freak has been in my damn wrinkles for a WHOLE ASS CALENDAR YEAR (LET ME OUTT LET ME OUUTT)
#Its so funny because you can quite literally track when my fixations cycle based on my photo gallery..... It sunk in November 1st 2023.#That was The First Screenshot....#He's been locked in here for a whole year#More like he's locked me in dude holy shit its bad WHAT
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This half-foot. Dandan.
Looks preety similar to this lady here (I'll put them together so you see):
Half-lidded eyes, black hair&eyes, small eyebrows, curly hair... Dandan's skin is lighter probably because of low sun exposure (dungeon), and he has tons of freckles because he preety.
This two are clearly relatives if not siblings.
Flertom is a mirror image of the lady up there. She got Chil's eyes. She even has almost the same haircut (a bit longer). She's clearly the mother. We've solved Chilchuck's wife mystery.
But this wasn't what I was going to say.
This implies that Wife and Dandan both knew Chilchuck since their childhood. Because there's no way that Chil was just friend of the sister. They're both close to the same age, and I'll say Dandan is a Younger sibiling (she gives big sis vibes, and he gives young bro vibes). So either she introduced him to her brother or he introduced him to his sister and they became best friends as kids.
Could you imagine how their relationship was after Chil's Wife left him?
He knows he has to say something, but he doesn't want to end his relationships. At the end he takes his sister's side. He distances a bit from Chilchuck, calling him an "aquitance" rather than a friend. It isn't that he hates him, is just that it's complicated. And they both know it. They're in good terms tho, they just aren't best friends anymore and they don't talk about it. Their worry is the guild, not their personal stuff.
That's why Dandan introduces Chilchuck to Laios. If they were in bad terms, he would've suggested any other half-foot. They both priorize the guild and general safety of their own race. That's why Dandan suggests Chil instead of a less experienced hafling. He cares about the union and respects Chil's time and experience in dungeons. They're on good terms, at least good enough. Summing up, I get the feeling Dandan doesn't particularly likes Chil after what happened with his sister, but he respects him at least.
#hi fandom its me again overanalyzing side characters from 5 panels alone and some background context! <3#i will do this again.. eventually... not on dandan. this is all i could see in him ;(#also i think their relationship gets better as time passes#it's been 4 years since wife left him#and 5 years since half-foot union was formed#i'm a wife×chilchuck lover. i'll believe they talked about it and eventually (give them a year) got back together#and Dandan allows himself to be friends with Chil again so he doesnt feel he's bettaying his sis by doing so or sth.#human interactions are so complicated.. i love them.. fascinating... eeling like Kabru. ill put them in a jar and study them like bugs.#Dandan#Dandan dungeon meshi#dungeon meshi#dunmeshi#delicious in dungeon#i need an oficial name for Wife. i need.#i have the feeling Wife's older because they got married quite young. and Dandan seems the same age as Chil.#if anything hes younger. idk. tgeres no way shes marrying at 12 (chil married at 13 and dandan is same age)#this is my theory#idk how they are i insist. im working with crumbs here.#chilchuck#chilchuck tims#chilchuck dungeon meshi#i need to get some sleep lol#my shit#dungeon meshi spoilers
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🍂.
#my art#fuck i forgot to sign it#house of the dragons#hotd#rhaenyra targaryen#alicent hightower#rhaenicent#hey its been a hot minute#i was not able to check my inbox for more than a year now#and honestly its... quite overwhelming haha#but for everyone who dropped a king message through my long periods of absence- thank you. truly means the world to me <3
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im everything you hate
blood ver
#junko enoshima#mine#um. hi#i just had top surgery and like man i have not been doing much at all since i got back from hospital. mostly just sleeping and scrolling...#but. i have spent leik my five days of recovery so far slowly painting a junko. so have that#sory i dont post much anymore. i do draw quite a lot i guess but i rarely have anything finished that i can post. or looks nice enough#ive been in a weird place with how i engage with public fandom for around a year now too and its been changing my motivation to post things#the danganronpa fandom can be a really cruel place. hence why i've been only showing up when i want to. stay safe out there.#also fuck PLEASE CLICK FOR QUALITY or i kill myself#do not tell me she has a missing finger. i know. i dont care. im going to sleep.#also dont talk to me about the transparency being fucked up I KNOW . 👎
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Do you ever think about the fact that the ONE time Sanji let himself be comfortable and enjoy dresses and makeup with cigarettes, Ace died and Luffy almost died all alone and so far away. Will Sanji ever forgive himself for daring to relax and explore himself a bit while catastrophic things were happening? (Jk he'll never do so again, just in case)
#will he ever stop feeling like its his fault#it obviously wasn't but the feeling of guilt#and the feeling that the one time he explored himself it led to this#and the association#and he can never let himself be so weak again (thank you Judge for this nonsense)#add in the fact that Ace might've been his awakening#and they did get along quite well and he had a crush on Ace#it would be DEVASTATING#losing Ace#not even mentioning what Luffy must have gone through#the guilt of not being there with his captain of being split away from Saboady even#i love transfem sanji#but crossdressing sanji too my beloved#mayhaps the egg was beginning to crack but trauma closed it shut#and he spent two years not dealing with it well apart from gettung stronger and finding ways to help his crew get stronger#sanji#one piece#one piece headcanons#black leg sanji#blackleg sanji#portgas d ace#acesan#just a bit
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